Since morning, the surroundings were chilly, unlike what others would normally feel. Buried, I hardly moved about from where I was seated, except for occasional toilet break, a washup, lunch...if not my eyes would be busying with their own work.
Not like there has been more work to be done compared to the past days, only that I had picked up a little more pace, since I was well behind the times. I see that I was always lagging behind, somehow, and there is always something that needs to be done or improved because I didn't do or didn't do as good. Most of my daylight hours today were spend like this, and when I was finally done, it was already nightfall. Despite the late hours, and leaving much later than usual, the streets were just as crowded, if not, even more as the sun had already went to other parts of the earth.
Food didnt taste good, my breathing was heavier than usual, my headaches were pretty bad with each step taken, even music didnt move me a bit. Walking almost blankly, I took little interest of what went on around me. After what that seemed a struggle, I was finally home.
The computer games didnt interest me a bit either, the mailbox was almost empty, save a few unimportant mails - one informing me my book is still yet to be seen, the other asking for volunteers for a trip, and a junk mail. As I speak, my head weighed an earth, nauseous, and the eyes are terribly exhausted after a long day; I was anything but sleepy. Hopefully, tonight would not be a night of pills and fumbling and tossing, but in nocturnal bliss of wonderful sleep.
My work has yet to be completed though, and today's work was a little tougher than usual. Much help would be needed to do them well, and hopefully they [help] are near. Perhaps my mood and even life would be totally different in near future, and though as much as I can't wait for them, I dread the recoil that follows. All I hope is that I be able to fulfill my obligations, day after day.
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